There’s Something About Mary (1998)

There’s Something About Mary is a 1998 romantic comedy starring Cameron Diaz in the leading role, as multiple suitors use deception to try and win her favour. It was a critical and commercial success, grossing $369 million against a $23 million budget, and was especially applauded for Diaz’s performance, earning her multiple awards and a Golden Globe nomination.

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It begins in 1985, as a young and nerdy Ben Stroehmann, as played by Ben Stiller, hopes to find a date for the senior prom. He gets a maybe from the first girl he asks, before setting his sights on recent transfer student Mary Jensen. When kids starting picking on autistic student Warren, he steps in to defend him, before Mary comes over to check on the victim who happens to be her brother. Warren is played by neurotypical actor W. Earl Brown, and it’s easy to see that the role is built around stereotypes that often feel like a mockery of disabled people, especially within the comedy setting - something that isn’t surprising from the same writer that created ‘Dumb and Dumber’.

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Ben and Mary walk back to her house, Warren close behind, as they talk about sports before Warren gives Ben a piggyback, and then expects one in return. Mary is taken in by how kind Stroehmann is to her brother, and asks him to be her date. Prom day arrives as Ben anxiously waits at Mary’s house, making light conversation with the family. She dazzles in a beautiful powder blue gown, coming down the stairs just before seeing Warren attack Ben, as he doesn’t like his ears being touched by strangers. This sends the parents into uproar, despite Ben’s intentions being innocent as he’d tried to give Warren a baseball, which he’d been looking for when he was belittled at school.

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This leads on to the most infamous scene from the film, as Ben goes to use the restroom. He cheerfully pees while watching the birds outside, until they fly away and he’s left with a view of Mary’s bedroom, where her mother is helping her with her outfit. Both are outraged as he quickly zips his trousers, but unfortunately he gets his tackle caught in the process. Multiple people come in to inspect the mess he’s made, including a fireman and police officer who help to free him. He’s whisked off in a ambulance, and that marks the end of his romance with Mary.

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A special featurette after the credits, ‘Behind The Zipper With Magda’, sees a short infomercial hosted by the matriarch of the film, which advises the best way to deal with such an injury in real life - this is because the artistic license of the movie presents a method that is dangerous and could make things much worse. I think the scene is significant, because it’s the one that people remember and unlike the rest of the movie it doesn’t rely on bigotry for laughs, as it’s a painful experience many people can relate to.

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We skip forward to 1998, as an older Ben enlightens his therapist with the failed love story that has dominated his life ever since. The professional had already left the room, suggesting this isn’t the first time he’s had to listen to the monologue, though returns to catch the end of it as Ben recounts a recent experience where he had to pull off the road when resurfaced memories sent him into a spiral again. Ben is told rest-stops are where gay people hang out, and it isn’t the only time this homophobic trope is used.

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Only a few minutes later, Ben’s friend Dom Woganowski does a stereotypical impression of a ‘camp’ person, backing up the theory his friend could be gay because he’s a writer, as supposedly most artists act like that. This uses queer people as cannon fodder for some cheap comedy, a recurrent theme throughout the film. Dom suggests a work colleague who can track Mary down and observe her life now, as Ben’s attempts in the past have failed. Pat Healey is a claims investigator, so the perfect detective for the job, but Ben regrets this decision later when his hire falls in love with her.

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Healey takes a trip to Florida and lodges with a friend who gets the information he needs on Mary, as he spies on her for the next few weeks. We’re introduced to Mary’s neighbour Magda, who’s self-tan shade definitely equates to cultural appropriation. She’s a caricature of the 80s matriarch with a bright blonde perm and housecoats in various colours. I barely recognised Lyn Shaye in the role, and her part relies on a visual racism to extract most of the humor from it.

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Pat studies every aspect of Mary, from her penchant for golf to her volunteering work with an enrichment programme for disabled people. He listens in on a luncheon she has with her girlfriends, nearly blowing his cover when a joke catches him off guard. Healey watches her undress through her bedroom window, accidentally getting a glimpse of Magda’s saggy melons. When he finally reports back to Ben, he feeds him a false image of Mary so that he can keep her for himself. This fabrication is built off a harmful view of what people see as conventionally attractive, suggesting that Mary is now much larger in size and a wheelchair user.

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Ben walks away defeated, but goes back to Healey’s office eventually, interested to approach his past flame after all. When he arrives Pat is boxing up his things, ready to move to Miami, and refuses to provide an address or phone number Ben can contact her with. Healey makes his first advances at the golf club she attends, and she’s distant at first, but they reconvene in the car park where he pulls out every trick to impress her; until he uses an ableist term to describe the disabled people he supposedly works with. She’s soon drawn in by his charm though, touched by the affection he seems to have for people like her brother Warren.

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It’s another opportunity for the writers of the film to mock disabled people, as Pat tells Mary about a client who was kept in a cage, until he was kind enough to take the person out on a leash and attach it to a washing line so he could run up and down. It shows how little disabled people are valued by the creative team, and is perhaps reflective of attitudes within society at the time, even from people who’d think of themselves as sympathetic. The way Mary brushes this off instantly and begins a relationship with him demonstrates how people can overlook oppressive behaviour for their own desires.

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In the next scene Ben helps move some furniture for a wheelchair user, who ridicules him for his weakness considering he’s able-bodied, and then a gag is made about the guys driving skills. He leaves as Stroehmann struggles up a flight of steps, a wardrobe strapped to his back, and a news crew arrive to berate him about parking in a ‘handicapped’ spot, in a way that implies asking for these spaces to be reserved for disabled people is an extreme request. The movie takes every opportunity to have a jab at those with disabilities, even in moments that do nothing to drive the plot.

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At a physiotherapy appointment, Ben’s chiropractor tells him he only saw Mary a few months ago at a medical convention, revealing she’s none of the things Healey claimed her to be. He tells Dom about the exciting news, and heads to Miami to see her, while Pat continues to surveil Mary. She gets ready to introduce Magda to her new love interest, as her neighbour is adamant her Border Terrier Puffy will be able to determine his character - and having wire-tapped the whole conversation, Healey is prepared with a tranquilliser to make the dog putty in his hands, putting it through the letterbox in a treat.

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Mary is amazed at how subdued Puffy is in Pat’s arms, while Magda swoons over the younger man, but disaster strikes as the women leave the room - it seems too much sedative has been given, as Healey realises the dog is dead. I must admit this scene is very funny, as he tries desperately to revive the dog through CPR and eventually shocking Puffy with a live wire, which does resurrect the pooch before Magda or Mary know anything is wrong. It’s a very clever and lifelike prop used too, complete with scorch marks when the electrical current starts a fire. The whole situation only plays in his favour, as he swaddles the dog in a blanket and Magda is smitten to see Healey cradling him like a baby.

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Having told Mary he’s an architect, she drags him to an exhibition where her friend Tucker, as played by Lee Evans, is attending too because of his own proclaimed specialism in the field. Tucker is soon to question Pat on his credentials, as he tries to fumble his way through the situation, making an exit at the first opportunity. Ben drives to Miami and kindly picks up a hitchhiker along the way, unbeknownst to him that the guy is shifting a dead body. He detours to take a leak at a rest stop, where the homophobic tropes appear again, as the police interrupt an orgy where Ben becomes implicated for being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Things only get worse when he’s investigated for the body in his car, though he’s subsequently cleared when the real murderer is caught.

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Meanwhile, Mary and Pat’s relationship deepens, as he feeds her information he’s learned through being a fly on the wall, knowing all the right things to say. Tucker appears at her office, warning that his contacts have never heard of an architect called Healey, as Mary starts to doubt her new love interest. Her friends console her, until Magda overhears a radio broadcast fabricated by Pat and a friend of his, as she’s drawn in again by his lies. He attempts to win over Warren too, though is on the receiving end of a punch when he makes the same mistake of touching his ears. Woganowski collects Ben from the jail and drives him to Mary’s workplace, where he’s finally reunited with the object of his fixation. She’s shocked to see him after so many years, but agrees to meet him that evening to catch up.

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Healey listens in on Mary informing Magda about this, as she recalls Ben’s awkward charm and ‘mouth full of metal’ that won her over all those years ago. Just then, Tucker arrives at her door, with more information about Pat and his criminal record. Once he leaves, Healey follows him to his pizza delivery job where he’s not using a pair of crutches, revealing that the investigator isn’t the only person creating a false persona to get the girl. Meanwhile, Stroehmann prepares for his date, following Dom’s advice to masturbate beforehand to ease his anxiety. He climaxes but doesn’t see where his ejaculation ends up, until upon greeting Mary at door is made aware of the sticky substance hanging from his ear, which the woman borrows for hair gel. It’s so gross but so effective in its vulgarity, as she spends the rest of the date with her fringe stuck up in the air.

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Pat and Tucker work together after this, as they go and spy on the school sweethearts. Anticipating Mary will be taking Ben back to meet Magda and Puffy, they throw treats through the window packed with a stimulant, hoping this will encourage the hound to take a serious disliking to Stroehmann. However, one tablet lands in Magda’s drink, and she’s completely unaware with an eye mask on; which leads to a hilarious scene, as the couple walk in to find the old lady furiously hoovering the house, lifting the sofa with one arm. Ben is tasked with letting Puffy out of the bathroom, who’s pounding against the door after being locked in there, and when he does he goes flying backwards across the living room with the dog attached to his face. After wrestling the terrier for a while, Puffy accidentally jumps out of the window, and in the next scene can be seen being carried while incased in plaster.

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Mary and Ben start to spend alot more time together, having fun yet often disastrous days out with Warren, but this all comes to an end when she receives a letter detailing how he came to find her after all these years. Stroehmann confronts Healey over it, assuming he sent the exposé to sabotage Ben, but it’s soon revealed it was Dom ‘Woogie’ Woganowski, Mary’s ex-boyfriend from college that prompted her to change her name and take out a restraining order after becoming obsessive. A running gag throughout the film is that he’s broken out in hives, a physical manifestation of his reawakened fixation on Mary. His demeanour is quite unsettling towards the end, showing the range of Chris Elliot’s acting talent. The movie concludes with a room of suitors vying for Jensen’s affection, as Ben tries to do the honourable thing and walk away, but Mary chases after him realising he’s her one true love. The credits roll with scenes of the cast miming to ‘Build Me Up Buttercup’ by The Foundations.

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Trailers for this tape include Pushing Tin, Office Space, and Ever After: A Cinderella Story, alongside an advertisement for the ‘There’s Something About Mary’ soundtrack album, something I did like about the movie; especially ’This Is The Day’ by Ivy. I’m glad I’ve watched this now, because I’ll know to avoid it in the future - despite a great performance from Cameron, the portrayal of disability in the film is too jarring for me to overlook its flaws. I’m not disappointed though because I need reasons to get rid of tapes and make more space.